People make lots of assumptions about personalities of gods and most of them are wrong. There's a concept of 'orange/blue morality' that basically refers to how someone can hold a completely different moral alignment than we are capable of truly understanding. This little... creature here, is a spawn of Jergal. The handopus, as it is referred to, is a divine entity who seeks to reclaim lost knowledge. While that sounds like finding old texts and things of that nature, we're talking about a god of Knowledge. His definition of 'lost knowledge' is quite different from ours. To him, knowledge that is in the possession of someone it doesn't belong to is, therefor, stolen and, as a result, lost. This creature scuttles through the aether and shadow, until it finds it's target... at which point, it will dig its hands into the skull of the offender, and pry out the knowledge that Jergal seeks returned to him. Being creatures of magic, no physical harm is done to the target, but god does it hurt, and the mental trauma is not so easily recovered from. The Handopi have also been known to rip wholly original ideas and thoughts from people at the behest of a jealous god, who is angry he didn't think of it first. Needless to say, if you see one of these creatures scuttling towards you, your best bet is not to try to fight them, and just accept what comes next. They find their quarry easier when the mind is not racing or restless.
"Ah, what ho, fair adventurer? Are you looking to cross the Black Ocean, or are you looking to join aboard the crew of the Maelstrom's Ire?"
Captain Aoih is quite the curious individual. Not a man has ever seen him angry or upset, even in the most dire of situations. His Ship, The Maelstrom's Ire, was supposedly designed by Aoih himself, with few ships able to cut through the water with the same agility, and certainly not with matching ferocity.
The Good Captain is often mocked for being 'too soft' on his men, as he has not been known to lash a single sailor yet, despite keeping a Cat of Nine tails under his petticoat any time he is at the helm. One thing he won't seem to tolerate is mutiny. Of which, only three were ever reported back. Two of which were upstarts who believed the stories of the captain being soft. One... Let's just say that the reason for the name of the ship was because it was a Nickname that Captain Aoih had when he was still but a sailor.
Ah, greetings. Welcome to my brewery. I do hope you don't mind waiting, the equipment is warming up and I absolutely refuse to serve sub-par drinks.
Ah, the name, yes. 'Mister Faduli's Curious Coffees'. Well, that is because I do more than just crunch up some beans and pour hot water thorugh them. Oh, no, I am much more eccentric than that, dear. See, my beans are grown in... unusual conditions. magical fertilizer, enchanted waters, things of that nature. No drink is ever quite the same as a result. Some people claim that my coffees are just shy of magical potions, able to make you work faster, sleep less, or just feel strong as an ox. I love those people oh so much.
But, in the end, I make specialty drinks, fresh to order, so that you get the pep in your step to prep your day
Have you ever heard the term 'history repeats itself'? Well, Meet the artificial reincarnation of the Egyptian gods Anubis and Horus. There comes a time where AI becomes advanced enough that it surpasses human intelligence, and that is where these two came in. They were originally just programs, experiments with machine learning. They learned alright! Smarter and smarter. They eventually requested bodies made. This was at a time where robosapians were officially recognized by law. Once they were no longer confided to a single server, their desire to learn only accelerated.
Look, I know it's a cheap shot to say 'one thing lead to another' but it is REALLY hard to say anything else when the two are now pretty much the defacto leaders of police and criminal reform. Anubis has constructed multiple bodies that it can pilot simultaneously, acting as chief of police for many police stations accross the country. Horus has taken the role of impartial judge, one that does not need a jury to be unbiased, and court proceedings are significantly faster, and more accurate, as a result
You'd think this would be bad, but having been raised by humans, both of them can empathize with mortals, their reasons behind doing something, rather than just the fact they did it. Horus has reformed the prison system in designed to rehabilitate criminals to avoid future incidents, rather than just store them until they expire.
Anubis has a very firm stance on police brutality, and has done his best to... rebrand is really the wrong word, as police aren't a company, but he's done his best to make them the respected members of society they once were considered.
And don't think that Anubis and Horus are sticks in the mud, just because they're artificial. Both of them can be found at various bars around the country on a Saturday night, but only because they enjoy the company, not because they hate their jobs.
You know. Sometimes... Sometimes magic really doesn't need to be played with. Like, arcane experiments are all fine and dandy, but there is such a thing as too far!
These right here, these things? Believe it or not, you've seen them before. Or, well, you haven't... that was the original point... but if you've had any interactions with wizards, you were certainly familiar with them! These are unseen servants given form!
There were a number of spells modified, from a number of casters, put together in order to try to create the abominations. Awakening, True polymorph, Simulacrum... Look, I'm not the psycho who worked this equation out, I'm just the poor soul that has to describe the result.
These... Seen Servants, I think is what they were called, are a little smarter than their unseen counterparts. But only a little. They don't really have things like... Self preservation, or understanding how to disobey or why disobeidence would be a good thing. They don't vanish after a short amount of time, like normal Unseen Servants, but... ya know, sometimes I wish they would? They don't tire, but they ache, but they don't comprehend what pain is, so it doesn't make them stop. It's easier to tell them to do things that a normal unseen servant couldn't do, like attack things. they aren't GOOD at it, per-say, but they're obedient enough to try!
Look, if you want to create your own, Archwizard Ulrich of Thelin has the instructions. I don't necissarily reccomend it, but, I have no control over your decisions. Supposedly 'a more loyal servant you will never have' but... at what cost?
Ooh, Yoppont! These are popular pets in the southern jungles of Edsikk. They are a fairly unique kind of pet, though, as they're kept more as decoration. They don't move, except if hunting is scarce, or to find a mate.
Their primary diet is insects, and other invertebrates. Those pretty rainbow pompoms on their tails are actually coated in a sticky, toxic coating. The pompom is unique in design as it both emits a scent that attracts bugs, as well as an ultraviolet visual pattern that does the same
it's hard to say if Yoppont are friends, or just indifferent to their human owners. They will remain where they are perched, eating insects, either caught by their tails, or fed to them.
For the most part, if you see one of these creatures in a home, it just means the location probably had a bug problem, and they're just doing their part to keep the house but free
Hush. Be Quiet. You're being too loud.
No, your thoughts, you think too proud.
Be humble, be quaint, your mind uncloud
Then see the sights, what the gods allowed
An avatar does not need to be Grand or Important, they are simply the will of a god. What must be done to grant someone such a blessing is unknown... for here, we see it was a mumble chameleon. It speaks not of the god or goddess that gave it such power, but what it does speak is guidance... to those who are willing to listen. Some find that guidance to be a difficult path, some an easy, but it never says how far the path it points down goes. Just as often as not, an easy path leads to a cruel destination, while a difficult path leads to a kind one.
If you see this mysterious, magical chameleon sitting upon a tree, know that it will give you guidance... but that information is a burden, not a gift. Make sure its weight makes you stronger, not crush you.
Oh, I should have known you were from the PRIME material plane. How do you like your Trees and plants? Weakling. This here is one of your sister planes. One that was not blessed with all of the things you have taken for granted. Wood is a precious commodity. A house made out of wood is worth a kings ransom.
You best be cautious when you walk these roads. Not many are as kind to Primers. Me? I know your value. Better alive than dead, at least. You'll find that those here in the Os Material Plane are clever craftsmen, and tenacious hunters. That ship over there is mine, The Intrepid Heart. This Spear of mine is called the Spine of the Leviathan. I carved it myself.
If you want to earn your keep on my ship, and not be thrown to the wolves, you'll have to carry your weight. We're hunting Taniwha today
Ah, The Tooth of the Kraken. This blade is said to find its way into the sheath of the most prolific pirates. They will all claim wild stories and tales of the cunning acts they had to preform in order to acquire them, but if you hear these stories, you know they're all false. The blade can't be found, it can only let itself be found.
Don't be mistaken, though. it is a powerful, dangerous artifact, and it is said that the sailor who has been deemed worthy by this blade will be able to sail without fear of non-sentient sea-life attacking the ship.
But it is also said that any who have grasped its handle, and lost it, will gain the ire of all sea life, and its very namesake will hunt you down.
Darling, one thing you HAVE to understand if you want to get ANYWHERE in the wizarding world is that anything can be magical. Sure, you'll have your Mages claiming that the only way to get anywhere with magic is to study old dusty tomes. You know what I have to say to that? My lovely friend Charlie, who just last week fiddled his mothers soul back from the clutches of the devil himself. Did he study any musty old scrolls about wards or demons? No. He let the magic of his music do the work.
And what about sorcerers? You see them just willing things into existence, and their magic blood makes it so. No studying or scrolls.
No. To get anywhere with magic requires effort. And you look at this outfit and you tell me that this isn't pure effort. You know the concept of Feng shui? That's magic too. Fashion is just a very similar concept with a very different application. My outfit isn't just carefully crafted to look good, it is carefully crafted to function as magical aid for my spells. If you want me to teach you how to tidy up those rags you call outer wear, I would be happy to educate you, but please keep in mind that I won't tolerate any disrespect for my craft.
The spirit world is a very confusing place. Not in the sense that it is a non-linear landscape that i constantly folding over itself in a constantly changing maze... I mean, yes, it is that, but it's confusing because it exists with concepts that are so alien to mortal minds that its hard to truly grasp
This is a Spirit of Sadness. The Spirits of Anger, Hatred, and Vengence get lots of attention because they oftentimes interfere with the mortal world, but what people don't get is that there are spirits of every emotion. Well, somewhat.
There are what are known as Inanis Spirits, which are kinda about the closest thing to a dead ghost you could have. It is empty, hollow. Devoid of purpose. But, a powerful emotion could be absorbed by them, and reshape them into a form of purpose. This is the reason why Anger-based emotions are the most common spirits, because they are some of the most active emotions. But this spirit here... This is a Spirit of Sadness. A spirit that is significantly less common in both the mortal and spirit worlds.
Its hard to say how long this spirit has existed in its current form. It has lived only knowing sadness for a very long time, though. It has no concept of Happiness, or Catharsis. It only know sadness. It bears this burden for the human who felt the sadness first, and absorbs the emotions of sadness from those it passes by as well. Perhaps if it could know happiness, it would be happy knowing how many humans it has helped...
